Sunday, September 7, 2008

Summer Reading Essay by Josh D

Down in the southern part of Nigeria was a small tribe. This tribe was led by a young male by the name of Okonkwo. Okonkwo, a strong and powerful individual, was very succesful with his tribe in keeping them safe and healthy. The problem with Okonkwo is that he feared weakness and tried to stay as far away from it as possible. Therefore, the only people in his tribe were both physically and mentally strong individuals. However, the tribe was unhappy with Okonkwo because he was to overbearing and really uptight. The tribe felt they had no room to breathe and they couldnt relax. One member of the tribe then stepped forward and told Okonkwo that the tribe was upset with him because he was to strict. Okonkwo was affected deeply by this. He then decided to take a walk and think about what he has done even with all of his success but failed to keep his people happy.

He walked for about a mile and decided to take a break at this very small stream. he sat on this flat surfaced rocked and admired the sunset in the distance and thought. All of a sudden this tall man came out of the thickly, rather large thorn bush. he looked scary and stumbled out. The two men stared at eachother for some time. Okonkwo was the first to speak. "Who the hell are you"

The man replied, " I Lennie", in a very shaky and uncertain tone.

Okonkwo stared at this man and smelled weakness. This Lennie couldn't even speak correctly. Okonkwo then asked, "What are you doing near around this area?"

" I got kickeded out my family because I wasn't good enough and I just walked until I found you," Lennie replied.

"Can you work and work hard?," Okonkwo asked.

"Yes I can," replied Lennie.

Okwonko realized that Lennie was mentally challenged but he thought about his tribe and how he mistreated the weak. Lennie was a strong man and Okonkwo thought that maybe Lennie could work in his villiage and it would show his other tribe members that he was easing up a little bit and being kind to others. Okonkwo came back to the tribe and apologized to his tribe members on how he acted poorly and he should treat his peers, children and elders respectfully. The tribe accepted his apology and Lennie was introduced. It was a big change to the tribe seeing an idividual not up to their standards, but also a fullfiling feeling becasue now they realized they got some slack and could relax and work and communicate in a more comfortable environment.

The next day, Lennie began work. Even though he was not great at working within the tribe, he worked extremely hard and was willing to help in any way. Okonkwo realized that everything is not about being strong physically and mentally. He realized as long as you have a good heart you should be loved.

At the end of the day, Okonkwo and Lennie met up with eachother.

"Your doin great," Okonkwo respectfully said.

"Thank you", Lennie happily responded.

"Im glad you ran into me", Okonkwo said with a chuckle.

"Im happy I found my true family", Lenny said with contageous smile.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I- I liked this story a lot. I liked how you took Lennie and instead of putting him back on a farm you had him doing work in a Tribe.
II- The conversations between both of them seened really authentic. Especially when Lennie introduced himself.
III- My favorite part of the story was when Lennie thanked him for letting him be a part of their little family..."Im glad you ran into me", Okonkwo said with a chuckle.

"Im happy I found my true family", Lenny said with contageous smile.
IV- In the 2nd paragraph there is a period and then next to it no capital letter.
V- Next time maybe you could put more talking between the two characters.

Anonymous said...

I. Joshy this story is so good! I felt happy after i read it because it made me smile when lennie caused this mean man to become a sweet caring man. The images i see when i read this kind of play out like a movie, he was super detailed. The story made me think about how little it takes to become a nice person, all you need is love.

II. The conversation between Okonkwo and Lennie seemed really authentic. The way Josh had Lennie talk made it seem more natural and real, because that’s how Lennie would talk to George in Of Mice and Men.

III. My favorite part of the story was when Lennie came out of the woods to find Okonkwo sitting and thinking. This was my favorite part because I feel like Okonkwo went on a little walk to try and think of ways he could become more caring and respectful and the answer just walked out of the woods. Lennie was there for a reason. "Im glad you ran into me", Okonkwo said with a chuckle. "Im happy I found my true family", Lenny said with contagious smile. This was my favorite line because both the men had found what they were looking for, love and respect.

IV. There wasn’t anything problematic in this story really except a few run-on sentences.

V. Next time consider making the two talk more, like maybe about where Lennie had come from or something.